Friday, January 25, 2008

why sometimes i can see a tim hortons mirage in the distance...

hello and happy new year!!

I'm sorry to not have been updating this blog properly -- owing to 1 part laziness, 1 part nothing really happens out here on a regular basis and 1 part a suspicion that no one really reads this! (hahaha, that is not accusatory, i only read it because i write it)

However, some of you have taken note of this and mentioned it to me in recent months.... and finally, i have a new story to tell -- a story of working for free in a country... but being ineligible for a proper visa...

now speaking of visas... although i am working here for months the government has refused me a proper visa --- i probably have told you that i have to go to Thailand every month and get a new tourist visa to stay here -- in the interim, i'm stuck in Lao!!! in addition to being terribly annoying ... they also insist on taking a new page in my passport to put a visa on and i've had to give them all 6 of my travel photos... but i begin to digress...

which leads me to yesterday: most recently i got a courtesy visa that didnt cost the usual $42 usd ... i was told i could extend it from here in Vientiane and couldnt leave the country until i go home to Canada.... fine... then on wednesday they say, we need a picture of you (i wonder, where the f are they keeping the other 6 pictures that they already have of me???!!) ...fine, i go and get them.... then yesterday they say 'we cant extend your visa from in Vientiane' -- so that means that I have to go to the border .... as we pull up to it around 4:30 i think to myself, this might be the last time i come to this border, then i think, maybe the last time in my entire life... i ask myself -- do i feel sad? i laugh, the answer is no. i suspect keysonne (the leader of the Lao revolution) heard me from beyond his grave....

i get my passport stamped to leave the Lao -- i only have 2 pages in the book and before can say anything (assuming it would have been understood) the damn woman stamps one of them... i cross the border into Thailand and come back to Lao... i go to get a new visa and they say they cant give me one because my passport is full... i show them the blank page --- apparently its the observations page that can only be filled by my government... (who knows that???) anyway i say, but i live in Vientiane, i work there, cant you just put it over an old Lao visa then? (there are, afterall, 4 in my passport already) --- i cant exactly go to my embassy in Bangkok right now... the dude says he cant help -- i'm incensed -- it was the knobs at his border control who took the last valid page of my passport to begin with!!!

i tried calling my boss and the assistant here -- but they wouldnt answer their phones.... this was remarkable because everyone answers their cell phone in every situation here... anger = rising... i then called a friend to send me the number of our embassy.... i cant tell you i was happy just then, i cannot. finally i got ahold of our assistant who spoke to the customs dude to no avail, she managed to get ahold of my boss who spoke to him for a long time and also with our project driver (who had the misfortune of waiting for me) and finally they gave me this special insert visa and let me go -- but its only good for 30 days!!!

that means i have to try and get a Canadian passport from Bangkok in a month! here are the ways that is difficult:
1. no one here has known me for 2 years
2. no one here has that damn stamp we need to put on the back of our photos
3. i need to send my passport and drivers licence to Bangkok, so i'll have no id and i'm flying domestically twice next month!!!
4. my citizenship card is at home -- so I need someone to go to a customs office and have them fax it to Bangkok
5. it takes 3 weeks to process and by monday i'll have expended half of my week of buffer period......

to summarize:

cost to leave Lao: 4000 kip
cost of shuttle bus accross bridge: 4000 kip
cost of shuttle bus back to Lao: 20 Bhat
Lao visa: 42USD
Canadian passport: 105 USD
someone at Australian Embassy to certify my existence: 49 USD
picture of my self with stamp (if this manifests itself): 40,000 kip
express mail to thailand: 20 USD
staying in Lao 2 more months: priceless????? (i wont tell you what i think the answer to that question is)

please note: if i end up living on the bridge between Thailand and Lao like that dude in the Tom Hank's movie who had to live in an airport -- i expect that you use the above information to save me!!!

at least i cant say this week hasnt been interesting, hey?

with any luck, i'll see you guys soon!

c